Despite all of the holiday baggage that we tote about this time of year we have managed to come through unscathed and kinder to each other than we have been in quite sometime.
And i've made the dreaded mid-20's MOVE BACK HOME. And while most of my belongings are still locked in my car because there is no room at ALL in my old room, i am not feeling as much like a failure or a mooch as i thought i would. And i'm trying my best to be as helpful as possible.
I'm hoping to hold on to the courtesy that 6 years of living with roommates in various dorms and company housing has taught me....somehow i think it'll help me get past my grandmother's obsessive preoccupation with cleanliness. And her old-world exclusivity. She has very clear ideas about how everything should be done. And the very clear idea that that way is the only way.
But this move is actually exciting in some ways. I'm happy to be able to help my grandparents out...happy to spend some time with them...and happy to be planning and working toward the goal of moving this summer. I keep trying to focus on the forward movement life is taking. Not what feels like a huge backward step.
Confession: I am watching the Vampire Diaries. I remember when season one first came on and i thought it was the stupidest thing i had ever seen. Now i'm obsessed. But the good news is that i'm halfway through the first season and i just started watching a few days ago. SOON I will be back and posting with some regularity. But i'm feeling the pre-holiday exhaustion...and i just need something to zone out to...and with all this hot guys...this'll do.
Today has been a day of travel and work. I signed papers in HR today so i can start working at my Alma Mater come the spring. I've been doing work with them on my off days for about a month. Its very exciting research and creative work.
I am the kind of person that trends towards lots of work on the plate. Its hard not to feel completely overwhemled. SO today is a day to remind myself that hard work is ok and that its ok that i just keep jonesin' for more to do. I just need to make sure I am completing tasks (nothing feels better than that) and taking time to have some FUN
Today, my friend P from Running Snail and Rainbow had a "Crafty Day." Rather than just getting together like we always do for coffee and donuts and chatting about our Artistic and Etsy Aspirations, we decided we would have a WORK DAY. For me what that meant was doing some photo editing and experimenting with some paper i got for prints (i wasn't able to order the matting materials in time) and focusing on developing my shop blog and my portfolio etc.
Though we did get together none of those things happened. I had forgotten a doctors appointment and ended up running around doing completely Useless and FRUSTRATING errands for much longer than i planned. But P and I got to sit down and chat and share and brainstorm over tea and playing with her adorable daughter.
Somehow, I believe that having just tried to clear the space in my day for doing work has totally freed up some brain space and i am suddenly very excited and invigorated. I'm settling down to do some planning and organizing and editing right now. AND IT FEELS SO GREAT!
We've rescheduled our work day for next monday (hopefully i'll have some tangible stuff to share next week :-) ) and i'm so excited to see what i can get done between now and then and what we'll make next week.
p.s- I ran into this lovely musician Josh Garrells over at The Cheap. I have been listening to him nonstop. This is my fav right now.
And one day when i was thinking of hopping in my car i just had to stop and wonder "But what do i really want to eat?"
Cauliflower was the answer. So i epicurioused a recipe for creamed cauliflower and went to the store and got a healthy looking head. And made it.
A few days later I wanted Cabbage. So i've been making a delicious ginger honey cabbage with green onions and potatoes. And Green Pea soup.
I am not good at creating menus on the spur of the moment. But i am learning to build food around what i most want to eat. And what a novelty! I think we are taught to check in with ourselves about so many things. Somehow food has not been something i've been listening to my body about. It feels good to start.